Broken Open Blog

What are you recovering from?

“What are you recovering from?”, Steve asked the group of us gathered around the work table for an early morning circle discussion.  “Everyone is recovering from something.”

He wasn’t calling anyone out – really, quite the contrary – he was calling us all in.

You see, that table was half women who are in recovery from drug addiction which often accompanies the particular trauma of sexual exploitation by way of prostitution and trafficking.  And the other half of the table with people like me, who haven’t traveled that road, but who no doubt, are in recovery from many things.

Pema Chödrön, in The Places that Scare You writes: “Compassion is knowing our darkness well enough that we can sit in the dark with others. It never is a relationship between the wounded and the healed. It is a relationship between equals.”

Since my college days, when the importance of service learning was really instilled in me, I was probably given quotes like Chödrön’s and posed questions like Steve’s, but still, it took me a good long while – decades maybe – to truly get off my high horse (as my mom would say) and see myself as an equal to the people with whom I was attempting to “sit in the dark”.  I’m not being hard on myself – something I’m in recovery from for sure – but just being honest.   As a white, able-bodied, straight, college educated, and cisgender woman, I am given the benefit of the doubt a lot, things work out for me more often than not, my privilege has afforded me the opportunity to take risks and even in doing so, stay pretty darned comfortable.

So what am I in recovery from?  For me, it’s the blind spots that accompany the privileges I have.  The ways I have to work to see “isms” at work – and often, it’s not in time, so then I feel I have failed and will never ever get it.  It’s in needing to remind myself that working for equity and justice is urgent, while also taking responsibility to keep my own children safe and fed and nurtured.  It’s recovery from the perfectionism that accompanies all of it – when will I get it “right”, how can I act if I don’t quite feel ready, what if I hurt someone even while I’m trying to do what’s right.

Coaching provides a space to be honest with what we are recovering from – so that we can show up for the important people and work in our lives with integrity.  It’s a process – it takes time, but luckily, no one has to do it alone.


Women: Interested in having some time and space to sort through your “recovery” plan?  Applications open for February Fire, my coaching workshop series taking place the last three Sundays of February from 3 to 5 PM!  And what’s more…. one full scholarship for the workshop is available by applying here.  Deadline to apply for scholarship is Jan 22 – so delay no longer.

Registration for February Fire is here and due Feb 5, 2020.  Hope to see you there!

February Fire: Winter Women’s Workshop

Do you struggle to stick to those resolutions for spiritual or personal growth?  

You know, the ones you were all fired up about just a few short weeks ago?  Is anything still kindling that spark? 

In this series of three workshops, we will use the rich language of Christian scriptures for the day to rekindle our inspiration *and ground those insights* by identifying where in our lived experience we can more adequately reflect the values we profess.

 Each workshop will build upon the last so that by the end of our time together, you’ll see those sparks of insight growing into fire that warms, purifies, enlightens – and fuels even more change. 

And the best part? The energy of beloved community to support us on the way. 

What will I experience?

  1. Guided meditations and activities, grounded in the Scripture of the day,  to facilitate deep reflection and visioning on our lives.  
  2. Group coaching to connect your insights to inspired action – the key to creating meaningful and lasting change. Group coaching allows for many perspectives and voices to bring about insight while also allowing space and time for personal insight.
  3. The support and accountability of a group = the power of community.
  4. Option to add individual coaching for reduced rate of $75/hour before, during or after the workshop.

What is the Cost

  • $50 for three part workshop series ($25 for Firstfruits members – info on becoming a member found here)
  • Optional – Individual coaching (up to 3 sessions at discounted $75/session rate)
  • BONUS: On Site Childcare available and provided for you. If needed, please note the ages of your child(ren) on the Registration Form.

Scholarships Available

One full scholarship ($50) available by filling out this application by January 22, 2020.  Form takes 15 min plus one 30 min conversation following submission to take place week of Jan 23 – 29.  Selected recipients will be notified by phone January 31.  


Sundays: February 16 and 23, and March 1, 2020 from 3 PM – 5 PM (Workshop builds on itself, so participants invited to participate in all three sessions in the series. Note: the original start date was February 9, when a big snow storm changed the plans!)


Firstfruits – The Village Court, 890 Elm Grove Road Bldg 2, Suite 6, Elm Grove, WI 53122


Fill out this form and submit payment  by February 14, 2020

What you will receive

6 hours of workshop activities, including 3 hours of group coaching

A journal to support your reflection and action

Takeaways including evidence based practices in emotional wellness, including: mindfulness and self-compassion practices

Customized action to take your insight into your daily life to facilitate actual change

Support and connection to community of women invested in spiritual growth

25% discount on individual coaching sessions (optional, up to 3 sessions available)